I am sick and tired of being nice…!
There are nice people, I know I am not nice nice…but compared to what i used to be like, I have been nicer lately….and its annoying.
You should be nice because it’s polite, it keeps your relations with people better, it helps you have a smooth day to day life. Being nice leaves a good impression with people, makes your life easier when interacting with fellow humans.
A nice person is more credible, more listened to and more respected. The term ‘nice’ implies a lot of qualities such as polite, respectful, decent and a lot more…
But nevertheless…
Sometimes I feel the urge to scream, to leave the room and bang the door, to hit someone in the face. Sometimes I want to just be alone.
I want a boxing sack, I really do. 15 minutes a day of hitting some sand would do me good, both mentally and physically. I want to get angry, no no, that i do a couple of times everyday. I want to unleash my anger. Not after I cool down and think the issue over, not after a day, not after running it through my mind…. Right away!! At the moment right when it happens, when the anger level is at its most….
I want to stop caring what people may think just for a day, I want to shout at someone at the top of my voice. I need to injure myself or break a bone. It would be great if I can be blinded with pain, deep and constant pain.
It just takes too much energy to try and be nice. And it isn’t even appreciated by anyone, so why bother?
I don’t guarantee my niceness in the near future; I’m losing my grip a little. Hopefully not too much and no serious damage will happen. I don't want to lose anyone/thing out of being stupid....
I have a lot of anger inside me, that must be unhealthy…
I think I’m gonna get a boxing sack! :D Any help??
Over....Wa domtom....
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Looking back...
They say you only get one chance, they say some people are lucky enough to get a second. Some even say more than two can happen, I don’t really know about that. I had my chance, which didn’t turn out so well. I am not about to whine nor tell a story.
Rather for now I’d like to take a moment to acknowledge the facts and move on. It maybe a while before I get my second chance, and I assure you I am in no hurry. And so the waiting begins.
I miss having someone to talk to…
I miss having someone to speak to freely…
I miss having someone who makes me feel better…
I miss picking up the phone for no reason…
I miss being listened to and understood…
I miss feeling relieved just by talking…
I miss her…
Over....Wa domtom....
Rather for now I’d like to take a moment to acknowledge the facts and move on. It maybe a while before I get my second chance, and I assure you I am in no hurry. And so the waiting begins.
I miss having someone to talk to…
I miss having someone to speak to freely…
I miss having someone who makes me feel better…
I miss picking up the phone for no reason…
I miss being listened to and understood…
I miss feeling relieved just by talking…
I miss her…
Over....Wa domtom....
Monday, February 1, 2010
A wish....
I have a wish, a wish to make anyone happy....
I saw this guy on TV after Egypt won the African Cup of Nations, he was saying "Gedo made me Happy, I want to find his and kiss him". (Gedo scored the winning goal in the Final)
I wish to make someone happy someday....
Over....Wa domtom....
I saw this guy on TV after Egypt won the African Cup of Nations, he was saying "Gedo made me Happy, I want to find his and kiss him". (Gedo scored the winning goal in the Final)
I wish to make someone happy someday....
Over....Wa domtom....
Friday, January 15, 2010
For Each and Every One....!
A good friend of mine recommended me to “StumbleUpon” ;)
So I stumbled upon this….About the 24th of March 1988, the day I was born….Here goes….
You were born on a Thursday.
I don’t really like Thursdays….
Your star sign is Aries.
I don’t really care…
Your birthstone is Aquamarine.
That’s nice…:)
The season was Spring.
All Green and nice…:)) It’s not easy being Green!
You were born in the Chinese year of the Dragon.
I know a Dragon ;) I am quite sure I’m not one though…
The US President was Ronald Reagan (Republican).
The UK Prime Minister was Margaret Thatcher (Conservative).
And the Egyptian President was Hosni Mobarak (Watany)...! And still is…!!
You are 21 years 9 months 21 days old.
True…So?
It is 69 days until your next birthday.
Nothing to get very ecxcited about...
In dog years you are 147 years old.
Oh! What a valuable of information…:X
You are 7,966 days, 191,206 hours and 688,341,447 seconds old.
Almost 8000 days….And I thank God for each and every moment on Earth!!
Over....Wa domtom....
So I stumbled upon this….About the 24th of March 1988, the day I was born….Here goes….
I don’t really like Thursdays….
Your star sign is Aries.
I don’t really care…
Your birthstone is Aquamarine.
That’s nice…:)
The season was Spring.
All Green and nice…:)) It’s not easy being Green!
You were born in the Chinese year of the Dragon.
I know a Dragon ;) I am quite sure I’m not one though…
The US President was Ronald Reagan (Republican).
The UK Prime Minister was Margaret Thatcher (Conservative).
And the Egyptian President was Hosni Mobarak (Watany)...! And still is…!!
You are 21 years 9 months 21 days old.
True…So?
It is 69 days until your next birthday.
Nothing to get very ecxcited about...
In dog years you are 147 years old.
Oh! What a valuable of information…:X
You are 7,966 days, 191,206 hours and 688,341,447 seconds old.
Almost 8000 days….And I thank God for each and every moment on Earth!!
Over....Wa domtom....
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Basically...
"It is never too late to give up our prejudices.." Henry D Thoreau
Over....Wa domtom....
Over....Wa domtom....
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
I cried….
“Ana mesh 3awez 2ab2a fil gam3a kda so3’ayar 13 sana we mayeb2aash 3andy so7aab”
‘I don’t want to be in University, a young 13 year old, and have no friends.’
“Nefsy lama akbar 2ab2aa 3alem computer we 2a3mel 7aga gedeeda le masr”
‘When I grow up, I want to be a computer scientist and develop something new for Egypt.’
His name is Mahmoud and he’s 11 years old.
His father is a simple Egyptian doctor.
He memorized the multiplication table of 7 at the age of three.
He has an IQ of 155, and he wants to go through normal schooling….
He’s nice, he’s cute and he’s funny….
He plays football, he has friends, and he does karate…
He teases his sisters, and they get back at him by kicking his ass with some karate practice…
He was at an Arabic school, until an international school offered him a full scholarship.
He had to pass an English exam, so he took a 3 week english course.
He got an offer to skip high school (from the Egyptian ministers of Education) and he refused.
He doesn’t want people to think he’s only good at math and computer sciences, so he’s reading on other stuff like history and humanities.
His daily life?
School in the morning and Computer Science courses at AUC in the evening. These courses (Cisco) are for graduate students. He finished them with grades over 90%. He will be an instructor in that course very soon.
How does he see his future?
“Ana mafeesh fee dema3’y 7aga 3’eer eny a7’alas el shahada we asafer amrica we adares, ba3deen arga3 balady we akoon kebert shewayaa we afeed masr we 2a7’tare3 7aga le masr”
‘I have nothng in mind except to travel to the USA and study, and then come back to my country when I am a bit older and improve Egypt and invent something for Egypt’
His Father?
“Da mesh ebny lewa7dy…da ebn kol wa7ed masry we 3araby. Law kol wa7ed bas fee ebnoo hayla2ey 3ando Mahmoud”
‘He’s not my son alone, he’s the son of every Egyptian and Arab. If each parent looks into his son, he’ll find he’s got his Mahmoud.’
“Kol masry beyshoof ma7moud bey7eebo we beysalem 3alee. Mahmoud ebn masr we mesh 3’areeb 3anhom”
‘Every Egyptian that recognizes Mahmoud greets him and loves him. Mahmoud is an Egyptian and is not a stranger to Egyptians.’
“Ana we omo benraby fee sakafet el tomoo7”
‘His mother and I are raising in him the attitude of ambition’
His dream?
“Ana nefsy ab2a as3’ar wa7ed ya7’od gayzet Nobel”
‘I want to be the youngest person to win the Nobel Prize’
ما شاء الله لا قوة إلا بالله…:))
Why I am boring you with all this??
I was watching a TV show, ‘el 3ashera masa2aan’, and there was this kid. The 'genius kid', as they call him, with an amazing IQ and not little of a propaganda surrounding him.
Yet he was not vain, he didn’t dream of money of fame, he – nor his father – had any prejudice. He was laughing, speaking – without complex words or smart remarks – , and simply acting like a kid.
He was clear, he was honest and he was sincere. He had dreams and he was working hard to realize them. He knew what he wanted to do, and he knew why. He had a vision.
His father taught him how to dream, and dream right. How to be ambitious yet humble. How to be 100 times smarter than the other kids, but still enjoy a simple game of football with them.
The father really gained a lot of my respect as well. He loves his country and believes in it, a trait he clearly passed on to his son.
He didn’t push his son to the limits, yet gave him his space. He opened doors for him to achieve his potential without killing the child in him. He taught his son that being loved and giving to his society is more important than personal gain.
The sense of belonging he is placing in his son is so needed in each and every individual.
Mahmoud is going to to be great, Mahmoud has a bright future and I hope from all my heart to see Mahmoud with a Nobel Prize one day....
I’m writing because I got touched. I’m writing because I saw hope. I’m writing because I found my inspiration. Thank you Mahmoud.
ما شاء الله لا قوة إلا بالله
God Bless Mahmoud, God Bless Egypt, and God Bless us all…..
He was reading the autograph Dr. Ahmed Zewail wrote him a couple of days ago, and in the end he’s reading the signature, “Dal no2ta Ahmed Zewail”, that just killed me.
I just got captured by his ambitious, optimistic, comforting smile….
I cried…:)
Over....Wa domtom....
‘I don’t want to be in University, a young 13 year old, and have no friends.’
“Nefsy lama akbar 2ab2aa 3alem computer we 2a3mel 7aga gedeeda le masr”
‘When I grow up, I want to be a computer scientist and develop something new for Egypt.’
His name is Mahmoud and he’s 11 years old.
His father is a simple Egyptian doctor.
He memorized the multiplication table of 7 at the age of three.
He has an IQ of 155, and he wants to go through normal schooling….
He’s nice, he’s cute and he’s funny….
He plays football, he has friends, and he does karate…
He teases his sisters, and they get back at him by kicking his ass with some karate practice…
He was at an Arabic school, until an international school offered him a full scholarship.
He had to pass an English exam, so he took a 3 week english course.
He got an offer to skip high school (from the Egyptian ministers of Education) and he refused.
He doesn’t want people to think he’s only good at math and computer sciences, so he’s reading on other stuff like history and humanities.
His daily life?
School in the morning and Computer Science courses at AUC in the evening. These courses (Cisco) are for graduate students. He finished them with grades over 90%. He will be an instructor in that course very soon.
How does he see his future?
“Ana mafeesh fee dema3’y 7aga 3’eer eny a7’alas el shahada we asafer amrica we adares, ba3deen arga3 balady we akoon kebert shewayaa we afeed masr we 2a7’tare3 7aga le masr”
‘I have nothng in mind except to travel to the USA and study, and then come back to my country when I am a bit older and improve Egypt and invent something for Egypt’
His Father?
“Da mesh ebny lewa7dy…da ebn kol wa7ed masry we 3araby. Law kol wa7ed bas fee ebnoo hayla2ey 3ando Mahmoud”
‘He’s not my son alone, he’s the son of every Egyptian and Arab. If each parent looks into his son, he’ll find he’s got his Mahmoud.’
“Kol masry beyshoof ma7moud bey7eebo we beysalem 3alee. Mahmoud ebn masr we mesh 3’areeb 3anhom”
‘Every Egyptian that recognizes Mahmoud greets him and loves him. Mahmoud is an Egyptian and is not a stranger to Egyptians.’
“Ana we omo benraby fee sakafet el tomoo7”
‘His mother and I are raising in him the attitude of ambition’
His dream?
“Ana nefsy ab2a as3’ar wa7ed ya7’od gayzet Nobel”
‘I want to be the youngest person to win the Nobel Prize’
ما شاء الله لا قوة إلا بالله…:))
Why I am boring you with all this??
I was watching a TV show, ‘el 3ashera masa2aan’, and there was this kid. The 'genius kid', as they call him, with an amazing IQ and not little of a propaganda surrounding him.
Yet he was not vain, he didn’t dream of money of fame, he – nor his father – had any prejudice. He was laughing, speaking – without complex words or smart remarks – , and simply acting like a kid.
He was clear, he was honest and he was sincere. He had dreams and he was working hard to realize them. He knew what he wanted to do, and he knew why. He had a vision.
His father taught him how to dream, and dream right. How to be ambitious yet humble. How to be 100 times smarter than the other kids, but still enjoy a simple game of football with them.
The father really gained a lot of my respect as well. He loves his country and believes in it, a trait he clearly passed on to his son.
He didn’t push his son to the limits, yet gave him his space. He opened doors for him to achieve his potential without killing the child in him. He taught his son that being loved and giving to his society is more important than personal gain.
The sense of belonging he is placing in his son is so needed in each and every individual.
Mahmoud is going to to be great, Mahmoud has a bright future and I hope from all my heart to see Mahmoud with a Nobel Prize one day....
I’m writing because I got touched. I’m writing because I saw hope. I’m writing because I found my inspiration. Thank you Mahmoud.
ما شاء الله لا قوة إلا بالله
God Bless Mahmoud, God Bless Egypt, and God Bless us all…..
He was reading the autograph Dr. Ahmed Zewail wrote him a couple of days ago, and in the end he’s reading the signature, “Dal no2ta Ahmed Zewail”, that just killed me.
I just got captured by his ambitious, optimistic, comforting smile….
I cried…:)
Over....Wa domtom....
Friday, January 8, 2010
I say....
I regularly run a Q&A session with myself…..I am pretty sure it isn’t healthy….but I can do nothing about it….
“You are just a decent guy” they say….
What do they know? Why is it that people see you the way they want, not the way it actually is?
How antisocial can you get? Very…
How far can you push people away? Very…
How hard can you resist approach from friends? Very…
How feasible is getting them back? Tricky
How do you know if the person on the other side of the phone – now screen, thanks to modern technology – is smiling when you are calling to check up on them? You never will…
Ever made a false excuse to get out of a appointment? Often…
Have you ever said “Hope to see you soon (3awzeen neshoofaak ba2a)” to someone, but not mean it? Sometimes….
Ever said it and wishing it never happens? All the time….
Last time you had your phone silent and pretended you didn’t get it? Everyday?!!!
We always find a way to tell special people they are special, at least we wish we do. But have you ever told normal friends that they don’t mean that much to you? Never…
This post is not making any sense? It isn't meant to....It won't....
Predicting the unknown is impossible…
Thinking positively is vital …
Optimism is magic…
Gratefulness is wisdom…
Thinking positively makes great people great…
Optimistic makes happy people happy…
Learning from life makes people experts…
Dreaming is indispensable….
Persistence makes everything possible……..Trust me on that one!
But you have to know what you are after….
Do you know what you are after? Not really…..
Any clues? Not really…just vague paths…
Optimistic? OH YES… :))
Over....Wa domtom....
“You are just a decent guy” they say….
What do they know? Why is it that people see you the way they want, not the way it actually is?
How antisocial can you get? Very…
How far can you push people away? Very…
How hard can you resist approach from friends? Very…
How feasible is getting them back? Tricky
How do you know if the person on the other side of the phone – now screen, thanks to modern technology – is smiling when you are calling to check up on them? You never will…
Ever made a false excuse to get out of a appointment? Often…
Have you ever said “Hope to see you soon (3awzeen neshoofaak ba2a)” to someone, but not mean it? Sometimes….
Ever said it and wishing it never happens? All the time….
Last time you had your phone silent and pretended you didn’t get it? Everyday?!!!
We always find a way to tell special people they are special, at least we wish we do. But have you ever told normal friends that they don’t mean that much to you? Never…
This post is not making any sense? It isn't meant to....It won't....
Predicting the unknown is impossible…
Thinking positively is vital …
Optimism is magic…
Gratefulness is wisdom…
Thinking positively makes great people great…
Optimistic makes happy people happy…
Learning from life makes people experts…
Dreaming is indispensable….
Persistence makes everything possible……..Trust me on that one!
But you have to know what you are after….
Do you know what you are after? Not really…..
Any clues? Not really…just vague paths…
Optimistic? OH YES… :))
Over....Wa domtom....
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Happy New Year.....
I started writing again….but I still lack inspiration…
Some people are special, some people you don't want to lose...... Yak... I miss you....
I know people who will read this and hate my guts more than they already do. I know people who will read this and understand. I know other people who will read this and act as if they care….
A lot of people look at me and say WOW, this guy has very nice things going on in his life. Others wonder why I don’t focus on one thing? And some resent me for things I did or do. I can’t blame any of them, yet I wouldn't pretend I care....
I’m having this period see….a little rough it is….
I laugh in peoples’ faces everyday with hope that someday I’ll find something to be happy about. I look into peoples’ eyes, to find no comfort in any. I’m like a painting without colors, a car without gas. I am not depressed though, nor am I miserable.
There is just something missing, and I know what it is. I know it pretty well and I even know how to get it. It’s in my reach, why am I not going for it?
Maybe I’m just wrong again….
I have a to do list; big deal if I don’t do anything on it!!
An extract "....Learn Spanish, renew passport, send interns email, Kashafa (FB group & camps), Look for masters school, BNP Paribas, clean the car, GUCMUN ideas, Fundraising trips, GCBT session planning, Chocolate Timz…"
Nothing getting done....I wonder why....
Recently, I may have thrown away something very dear, something I probably won't ever find again. The question of whether that was the right thing to do remains unanswered, and I doubt it will ever be……
I don’t like how my life is going….I am losing passion for the things I like the most….and I am not doing anything about it….
I don’t like a lot of things about myself….
I am Lost….and trust me the worst thing in Life is being Lost…..period!
But the beauty about Life is that there will always be some signs to follow, some guides to lead the way….they will appear sooner or later!
I will hold on to that thought….Faith is all that is needed…
Life is Good, I truly believe that…
I don’t really want this on Facebook….maybe this post belongs to a ‘diary’ not a blog (not that I have one!)….
No more posts on Facebook….A blog is a blog....
Two sentences keep ringing in my ear, and they would make all my world right….I know it very well. I don’t know why I am not listening…..
Sometimes I pity those who deal with me daily…. :)
Over....Wa domtom....
Some people are special, some people you don't want to lose...... Yak... I miss you....
I know people who will read this and hate my guts more than they already do. I know people who will read this and understand. I know other people who will read this and act as if they care….
A lot of people look at me and say WOW, this guy has very nice things going on in his life. Others wonder why I don’t focus on one thing? And some resent me for things I did or do. I can’t blame any of them, yet I wouldn't pretend I care....
I’m having this period see….a little rough it is….
I laugh in peoples’ faces everyday with hope that someday I’ll find something to be happy about. I look into peoples’ eyes, to find no comfort in any. I’m like a painting without colors, a car without gas. I am not depressed though, nor am I miserable.
There is just something missing, and I know what it is. I know it pretty well and I even know how to get it. It’s in my reach, why am I not going for it?
Maybe I’m just wrong again….
I have a to do list; big deal if I don’t do anything on it!!
An extract "....Learn Spanish, renew passport, send interns email, Kashafa (FB group & camps), Look for masters school, BNP Paribas, clean the car, GUCMUN ideas, Fundraising trips, GCBT session planning, Chocolate Timz…"
Nothing getting done....I wonder why....
Recently, I may have thrown away something very dear, something I probably won't ever find again. The question of whether that was the right thing to do remains unanswered, and I doubt it will ever be……
I don’t like how my life is going….I am losing passion for the things I like the most….and I am not doing anything about it….
I don’t like a lot of things about myself….
I am Lost….and trust me the worst thing in Life is being Lost…..period!
But the beauty about Life is that there will always be some signs to follow, some guides to lead the way….they will appear sooner or later!
I will hold on to that thought….Faith is all that is needed…
Life is Good, I truly believe that…
I don’t really want this on Facebook….maybe this post belongs to a ‘diary’ not a blog (not that I have one!)….
No more posts on Facebook….A blog is a blog....
Two sentences keep ringing in my ear, and they would make all my world right….I know it very well. I don’t know why I am not listening…..
وَمَنْ يَتَّقِ اللَّهَ يَجْعَلْ لَهُ مَخْرَجًا (2) وَيَرْزُقْهُ مِنْ حَيْثُ لا يَحْتَسِبُ
وَمَنْ يَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللَّهِ فَهُوَ حَسْبُهُ إِنَّ اللَّهَ بَالِغُ أَمْرِهِ قَدْ جَعَلَ اللَّهُ لِكُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدْرًا (3)3
Sometimes I pity those who deal with me daily…. :)
Over....Wa domtom....
Sunday, January 3, 2010
A New Post....
It’s just very difficult to begin...clicking on ‘new post’ and writing something that other people would see….
I believe it has been almost two months, I often passed by a situation or experienced something or witnessed a scene, which made me think….“I’ll post about this”. Two things usually stopped me.
The first being laziness, enough said!
The second being the fear of writing something I am not fully content about…I blame that on the stupid perfectionist inside me....
What applies to blogging….applies to my studies (exams start Monday….still at square 1..!), my future plans and to a lot of other things….
No…not Kool….not at all…
But what to do?? There are just some things one has to accept about himself…
Or should I not…?!
Well at least I decided I’ll start blogging more….let’s see how that turns out….
Over....Wa Domtom....
Friday, October 30, 2009
I Believe....
----To My NATO RA and My SC CC.....----
I believe man controls his Destiny....I believe everything is in God's hands as well....
I believe that everything happens for a Reason...I believe it's not always Obvious as well....
I believe good things happen to Good People....I believe good things happen to Bad People as well...
I believe in All that's Good....I believe in Everything else as well....
I believe in Clenching to things you want to keep....I believe in Letting Go as well....
I believe nothing comes Easy....I believe nothing is Impossible as well....
I believe in living the Moment....I believe in preparing for the Future as well...
I believe that there is a everlasting Afterlife....I believe this Life is worth living as well...
I believe the past is History....I believe history should be Analyzed as well....
I believe I'm happy....I believe I should be as well....
I believe friends are hard to find....I believe they can come easy as well....
I believe in trying new things...I believe in having the usual as well....
I believe Egypt is the most beautiful country on Earth....I believe there's plenty of room for improvement as well...
I believe in the power of the individual....I believe in the power of the society as well...
I believe in the power of love....I believe in it's destructing nature as well....
I believe that you should always be yourself....I believe you should adapt to the surroundings as well....
I believe there are no limits....I believe there always are as well....
I believe in simplicity....I believe in complexity as well...
I believe timing is everything....I believe it's never too late as well...
I believe in Scouting....I believe in MUN as well....
I believe I am crazy….I believe I am as sane as can be as well….
I believe nothing is Perfect….I believe nothing is 100% flawed as well….
I believe in Science….I believe life is man’s greatest teacher as well….
I believe Life’s Good….I believe it always is and will be as well….
I believe Happiness lies in One’s own hands….I believe it lies in no one else’s as well….
I believe I have the Right to Believe….I believe I am obliged to as well…
I Know I Believe….I believe I Believe as well....
Over....Wa domtom....
I believe man controls his Destiny....I believe everything is in God's hands as well....
I believe that everything happens for a Reason...I believe it's not always Obvious as well....
I believe good things happen to Good People....I believe good things happen to Bad People as well...
I believe in All that's Good....I believe in Everything else as well....
I believe in Clenching to things you want to keep....I believe in Letting Go as well....
I believe nothing comes Easy....I believe nothing is Impossible as well....
I believe in living the Moment....I believe in preparing for the Future as well...
I believe that there is a everlasting Afterlife....I believe this Life is worth living as well...
I believe the past is History....I believe history should be Analyzed as well....
I believe I'm happy....I believe I should be as well....
I believe friends are hard to find....I believe they can come easy as well....
I believe in trying new things...I believe in having the usual as well....
I believe Egypt is the most beautiful country on Earth....I believe there's plenty of room for improvement as well...
I believe in the power of the individual....I believe in the power of the society as well...
I believe in the power of love....I believe in it's destructing nature as well....
I believe that you should always be yourself....I believe you should adapt to the surroundings as well....
I believe there are no limits....I believe there always are as well....
I believe in simplicity....I believe in complexity as well...
I believe timing is everything....I believe it's never too late as well...
I believe in Scouting....I believe in MUN as well....
I believe I am crazy….I believe I am as sane as can be as well….
I believe nothing is Perfect….I believe nothing is 100% flawed as well….
I believe in Science….I believe life is man’s greatest teacher as well….
I believe Life’s Good….I believe it always is and will be as well….
I believe Happiness lies in One’s own hands….I believe it lies in no one else’s as well….
I believe I have the Right to Believe….I believe I am obliged to as well…
I Know I Believe….I believe I Believe as well....
Over....Wa domtom....
Monday, September 21, 2009
A so worth it two hour drive…
Out of Cairo around noon. After the usual – key search, gas, tires..etc. – on the road. A little speeding but not too much, stopping for some supplies and a quick incident with the house keys not working. I walked in….took the table and chairs out….looked up and there it was……
Oh I missed the Sea!! Not the beach, not the people lingering around….the Sea. The pure blue, the mesmerizing sound, the white sand, the clear air, the intense smell that u never appreciate yet sorely miss….
I just couldn’t help but sweep the floor outside, it was really filthy, and only took 5 minutes. Of course it earned me some teasing from my brother, but – quoting my French roommate –“it’s ok!”.
Done…! I put on my swimming suit and took a towel and went to the swimming pool, had quick 5 minute spell inside and then went back. A new book and a chair, the sun above and the sea in direct view….Perfect..!
30 minutes and I was starting to dose off….Decided to finish the chapter and then have a nap…the urge to read on a few pages more wasn’t strong enough though. Went inside, got a mattress and attempted to lie down on the grass. Thanks to some small insects that just couldn’t leave me alone, 2 minutes later I was on the chair with my legs stretched and my eyes gently slopping.
I woke up, it was getting chilly. I got up, prayed and in the sun with a pillow under my head.... another nap. My brother arrived and woke me up, I was just starting to ask for food, when a bird hit the pergola and dropped dead in the balcony…..So a blog post was due…
Next…Bike!! Haven’t done that in years…Still catching my breath, forgot how much an effort that was – specially on the legs –…or maybe I am just getting old…
I was away for three months, I missed a lot of things…..but this was something I didn’t account for. I know I’ll be back in two days; but for now, I choose to enjoy….
My Mac on my lap, crappy food on its way, the fantastic blue sea, ideal weather, the dead bird on the fence in front of me and all the world postponed even if for a few hours……Maybe this is As Good As It Gets….:))
I'm off for a walk....I'm Happy....Hope you are as well...
Over…Wa Domtom…
Oh I missed the Sea!! Not the beach, not the people lingering around….the Sea. The pure blue, the mesmerizing sound, the white sand, the clear air, the intense smell that u never appreciate yet sorely miss….
I just couldn’t help but sweep the floor outside, it was really filthy, and only took 5 minutes. Of course it earned me some teasing from my brother, but – quoting my French roommate –“it’s ok!”.
Done…! I put on my swimming suit and took a towel and went to the swimming pool, had quick 5 minute spell inside and then went back. A new book and a chair, the sun above and the sea in direct view….Perfect..!
30 minutes and I was starting to dose off….Decided to finish the chapter and then have a nap…the urge to read on a few pages more wasn’t strong enough though. Went inside, got a mattress and attempted to lie down on the grass. Thanks to some small insects that just couldn’t leave me alone, 2 minutes later I was on the chair with my legs stretched and my eyes gently slopping.
I woke up, it was getting chilly. I got up, prayed and in the sun with a pillow under my head.... another nap. My brother arrived and woke me up, I was just starting to ask for food, when a bird hit the pergola and dropped dead in the balcony…..So a blog post was due…
Next…Bike!! Haven’t done that in years…Still catching my breath, forgot how much an effort that was – specially on the legs –…or maybe I am just getting old…
I was away for three months, I missed a lot of things…..but this was something I didn’t account for. I know I’ll be back in two days; but for now, I choose to enjoy….
My Mac on my lap, crappy food on its way, the fantastic blue sea, ideal weather, the dead bird on the fence in front of me and all the world postponed even if for a few hours……Maybe this is As Good As It Gets….:))
I'm off for a walk....I'm Happy....Hope you are as well...
Over…Wa Domtom…
Thursday, August 20, 2009
The Taste of failure….
----Below you will get a brief account of my job in Brussels. A lot of stuff cannot be publicized due to information disclosure restrictions----
It’s amazing how I forgot how it felt like to fail. I got used to things going my way. I mean I don’t always get perfect results, but I haven’t endured a serious fallout for quite a while. But it had to happen some time, and I thank God I only failed myself and not someone else! And most importantly, it was materialistic affecting only this life we live in, although it had a great psychological effect on me.
This is a story about an intern, myself, who got screwed by ‘0.9’!!
Background
I have been working on my project for 9 weeks, for 'the company'. It is the a very big consumer goods company in the world.
I work in the packaging department, on dry laundry (powder detergents) for Central and Eastern Europe, Middle East and Africa (CEEMEA). My project is about reducing the height of the bags which contain the laundry granules like the ones used in homes for brands like -------.
Just to get an insight of how things work here, you’re on your own. Let me elaborate.
I have a supervisor who is responsible for me, and he helps me a lot in terms of general direction of my project planning and providing contacts. But from then on, you have to contact the people, arrange meetings, fix sessions to know about stuff and figure out why and how I want to proceed with my work. From day 1, I had to contact people in my department, on the premises I work at, in Europe and even in other continents. That’s another story I’m not sure I want to talk about!
Progress
My work is based on an excel sheet, which took me 4 weeks to assemble. Of course the Question in your minds is “Why the Hell did it take you 4 weeks for an excel sheet?” and the answer is NOT “Because I’m stupid”!! I had to get data about all SKUs which are over 350, each with about 15 attributes (SKU: Stock keeping unit. An individual color, size, flavor or pack of product that requires a separate code number to distinguish it from other items. ‘the compay runs on Acronyms, they even have a website where there is a database, 4397 as I am writing.’). Did I just copy paste the data? Did I get it all from one source? Was each input done once? To cut a long story short, it was a horribly long and boring excel sheet to complete (21MB with no pictures or anything). This excel sheet calculates how much money the company would save if this project was applied. Why I am talking extensively on the excel sheet will be clear later.
After the first four weeks, I moved on to more slightly interesting stuff, like technical drawings and test plans, but all 100% based on the savings excel sheet. I can’t say it was going great, because it never was for me in this internship, however it was quite ok. The most challenging thing was to schedule a test in one of the plants, because getting time on the line was extremely difficult because it meant losing money. But I had significant savings in my sheet, and I was one phone call away from getting the line time I wanted.
Week 9, Day 3 – Wednesday 12th of August
Excel is all about numbers. It’s a program mainly used for calculations. Subsequently my work on it was mainly mathematical equations. Two of these carried the greatest significance, and one of them takes credit for me boring you here.
I chose one of the two to work on, and was calling the plant next morning. I was doing mockups for a presentation, when I discovered something was wrong, and when I corrected it…..Here is where the ‘0.9’ comes in, see I misplaced the number.
Instead of dividing the equation by 0.9 I multiplied it by 0.9, which gave me shorter length and subsequently greater savings. Hence my savings went back to almost one sixth to what they were. For the mathematically deprived people, this means that if I had 600$ of savings, now I had 100$. Of course these aren’t the real numbers, but with the numbers I had, in the company's terms, I don’t have a case.
If this happened in the first weeks while I was in the first weeks, this would have been completely fine; but after 9 weeks and all this things built on my sheet, it was a disaster!
I went through every sheet, every row, every column, every cell, every equation, every number…..maybe something else was wrong that will make everything right again….!!! but nothing….I was on my desk till they closed the lights (8pm, the latest normal employees leave is 6, company is open for employees 24/7) and stayed on the corridor light for a while more. I gave up, got my laptop and everything and went back home.
I felt horrible; I couldn’t remember when I last felt this bad. I had stomach ache, I didn’t eat for 24 hours, I had a constant urge to vomit, I felt hot like in a sauna and I was repeating all the prayers (ad3eya) I know for these kind of situations non-stop. I arrived home, prayed and tried to do anything else; but failing to do so I slept….(The one thing I can do at any time at any circumstance is sleep, a blessing and a curse. This time a huge blessing!)
I kept asking myself, am I panicking?!! I don’t panic!!.....Am I blaming myself for what happened??.....What shall I do? Confront my boss of course…How will he take it?
I removed all my personal stuff that I had on the work laptop, tidied my room, checked my passports and removed the keychain I had on my drawer keys; prepared for anything to happen the next morning. I almost called my boss on the mobile to make sure he was coming tomorrow so I can tell him. I had a very big part of my brain sure that the last day of my internship is tomorrow, I even thought about how will I give them their money back; although the working part of my mind was telling me that was quite unlikely.
You can – or can’t – imagine what was going in my mind until I was asleep that night….we’ll get to that later….
Week 9 Day 4 – Thursday 13th of August, The Aftermath
Woke up early, the earliest since late June, feeling exactly the same as I slept. Dragged myself to the shower, knowing I’m getting closer to my doomed fate. To the company; on the metro feeling as horrible as the last time I was on it some 10 hours ago. Arrived at work, waited for my supervisor to come, and then told him the story.
His reaction was controlled; however I could see the disappointment. He told me to look at everything again carefully and recommend what to do now. Since that moment, I started feeling much better. It’s like I was running up stairs and I reached the top, very tired but relieved.
I knew the game wasn’t over, I knew it all along, although at some points my mind had put it to me that way.But for the rest of the day, I had a much clearer mind.
It all clears up….Almost!
The next morning, the discussion took place, and it was clear there was no good solution. But to find something to keep me busy for the next 4 weeks, some sort of plan was agreed upon. I was thinking…‘Thank God; that could have turned out a lot worse’.
So after 2 days of going through the sheet extensively, the other formula was looking fishy as well. I made some calls and emails, and then I THE document. And turned out I had the other one wrong as well. In the end – lots of phone calls, emails, discussions – there seemed to be something there. In the words of my supervisor “OH, So there is still Hope”. My response was “There is always hope” and that came out so naturally, that I am sure it was not my mind speaking….!
So Life goes on, and my project is progressing.....time passes and I'm approaching the end of my 3 months....and I am trying to do my best.
And all the above is about….
You question yourself, you get doubts, and the horizon looks like a never-ending road. You stop believing for seconds, only to find out that that’s the only thing you have. You wonder how things can ever be ok again, with the knowledge that it will be in no time temporarily blocked out of your brain. You keep thinking of how this could have been avoided, neglecting that it shouldn’t. You never stop thinking about what’s going to happen tomorrow, forgetting the fact that you can do nothing about it.
Why is it that we forget who is in control?? Why is it that we think we know it all?? Why is it that we keep rubbing our eyes till we don’t see no more, upping the volume till we hear no more?….Why continue eating more until we lose the taste, dreaming and dreaming with no ambition to take the further step??
Nothing is permanent. Not success and certainly not failure. But a reality check for me was needed. Life is a series of events, and it’s God’s mercy that every person has it in him to pass through. It’s the person himself who chooses – in times of ease and difficulties alike – what to do, who and what to rely on, how to react and how much to learn. For me life is a very good teacher, and I claim to be a good student. At least in front of myself I can say I reacted well enough, didn’t attempt stupid or half solutions (like hiding and getting through the last weeks. YES, it poped in my mind of course!), relied on whom I trusted, did what my conscious told me to do and got one big lesson out of it.
I sincerely believe that whatever happens is for the best, no matter how it looks in the beginning….but that’s me…and another story.…
Over Wa Domtom….
P.S. They work! I mean the prayers….Here are the ones I know….There are many more….May God bless you all…:))
لا إله إلا أنت سبحانك اني كنت من الظالمين
اللهم أجرني في مصيبتي واخلفني خيرا منها
اللهم اني لا أسألك رد القضاء ولكني أسألك اللطف فيه
It’s amazing how I forgot how it felt like to fail. I got used to things going my way. I mean I don’t always get perfect results, but I haven’t endured a serious fallout for quite a while. But it had to happen some time, and I thank God I only failed myself and not someone else! And most importantly, it was materialistic affecting only this life we live in, although it had a great psychological effect on me.
This is a story about an intern, myself, who got screwed by ‘0.9’!!
Background
I have been working on my project for 9 weeks, for 'the company'. It is the a very big consumer goods company in the world.
I work in the packaging department, on dry laundry (powder detergents) for Central and Eastern Europe, Middle East and Africa (CEEMEA). My project is about reducing the height of the bags which contain the laundry granules like the ones used in homes for brands like -------.
Just to get an insight of how things work here, you’re on your own. Let me elaborate.
I have a supervisor who is responsible for me, and he helps me a lot in terms of general direction of my project planning and providing contacts. But from then on, you have to contact the people, arrange meetings, fix sessions to know about stuff and figure out why and how I want to proceed with my work. From day 1, I had to contact people in my department, on the premises I work at, in Europe and even in other continents. That’s another story I’m not sure I want to talk about!
Progress
My work is based on an excel sheet, which took me 4 weeks to assemble. Of course the Question in your minds is “Why the Hell did it take you 4 weeks for an excel sheet?” and the answer is NOT “Because I’m stupid”!! I had to get data about all SKUs which are over 350, each with about 15 attributes (SKU: Stock keeping unit. An individual color, size, flavor or pack of product that requires a separate code number to distinguish it from other items. ‘the compay runs on Acronyms, they even have a website where there is a database, 4397 as I am writing.’). Did I just copy paste the data? Did I get it all from one source? Was each input done once? To cut a long story short, it was a horribly long and boring excel sheet to complete (21MB with no pictures or anything). This excel sheet calculates how much money the company would save if this project was applied. Why I am talking extensively on the excel sheet will be clear later.
After the first four weeks, I moved on to more slightly interesting stuff, like technical drawings and test plans, but all 100% based on the savings excel sheet. I can’t say it was going great, because it never was for me in this internship, however it was quite ok. The most challenging thing was to schedule a test in one of the plants, because getting time on the line was extremely difficult because it meant losing money. But I had significant savings in my sheet, and I was one phone call away from getting the line time I wanted.
Week 9, Day 3 – Wednesday 12th of August
Excel is all about numbers. It’s a program mainly used for calculations. Subsequently my work on it was mainly mathematical equations. Two of these carried the greatest significance, and one of them takes credit for me boring you here.
I chose one of the two to work on, and was calling the plant next morning. I was doing mockups for a presentation, when I discovered something was wrong, and when I corrected it…..Here is where the ‘0.9’ comes in, see I misplaced the number.
Instead of dividing the equation by 0.9 I multiplied it by 0.9, which gave me shorter length and subsequently greater savings. Hence my savings went back to almost one sixth to what they were. For the mathematically deprived people, this means that if I had 600$ of savings, now I had 100$. Of course these aren’t the real numbers, but with the numbers I had, in the company's terms, I don’t have a case.
If this happened in the first weeks while I was in the first weeks, this would have been completely fine; but after 9 weeks and all this things built on my sheet, it was a disaster!
I went through every sheet, every row, every column, every cell, every equation, every number…..maybe something else was wrong that will make everything right again….!!! but nothing….I was on my desk till they closed the lights (8pm, the latest normal employees leave is 6, company is open for employees 24/7) and stayed on the corridor light for a while more. I gave up, got my laptop and everything and went back home.
I felt horrible; I couldn’t remember when I last felt this bad. I had stomach ache, I didn’t eat for 24 hours, I had a constant urge to vomit, I felt hot like in a sauna and I was repeating all the prayers (ad3eya) I know for these kind of situations non-stop. I arrived home, prayed and tried to do anything else; but failing to do so I slept….(The one thing I can do at any time at any circumstance is sleep, a blessing and a curse. This time a huge blessing!)
I kept asking myself, am I panicking?!! I don’t panic!!.....Am I blaming myself for what happened??.....What shall I do? Confront my boss of course…How will he take it?
I removed all my personal stuff that I had on the work laptop, tidied my room, checked my passports and removed the keychain I had on my drawer keys; prepared for anything to happen the next morning. I almost called my boss on the mobile to make sure he was coming tomorrow so I can tell him. I had a very big part of my brain sure that the last day of my internship is tomorrow, I even thought about how will I give them their money back; although the working part of my mind was telling me that was quite unlikely.
You can – or can’t – imagine what was going in my mind until I was asleep that night….we’ll get to that later….
Week 9 Day 4 – Thursday 13th of August, The Aftermath
Woke up early, the earliest since late June, feeling exactly the same as I slept. Dragged myself to the shower, knowing I’m getting closer to my doomed fate. To the company; on the metro feeling as horrible as the last time I was on it some 10 hours ago. Arrived at work, waited for my supervisor to come, and then told him the story.
His reaction was controlled; however I could see the disappointment. He told me to look at everything again carefully and recommend what to do now. Since that moment, I started feeling much better. It’s like I was running up stairs and I reached the top, very tired but relieved.
I knew the game wasn’t over, I knew it all along, although at some points my mind had put it to me that way.But for the rest of the day, I had a much clearer mind.
It all clears up….Almost!
The next morning, the discussion took place, and it was clear there was no good solution. But to find something to keep me busy for the next 4 weeks, some sort of plan was agreed upon. I was thinking…‘Thank God; that could have turned out a lot worse’.
So after 2 days of going through the sheet extensively, the other formula was looking fishy as well. I made some calls and emails, and then I THE document. And turned out I had the other one wrong as well. In the end – lots of phone calls, emails, discussions – there seemed to be something there. In the words of my supervisor “OH, So there is still Hope”. My response was “There is always hope” and that came out so naturally, that I am sure it was not my mind speaking….!
So Life goes on, and my project is progressing.....time passes and I'm approaching the end of my 3 months....and I am trying to do my best.
And all the above is about….
You question yourself, you get doubts, and the horizon looks like a never-ending road. You stop believing for seconds, only to find out that that’s the only thing you have. You wonder how things can ever be ok again, with the knowledge that it will be in no time temporarily blocked out of your brain. You keep thinking of how this could have been avoided, neglecting that it shouldn’t. You never stop thinking about what’s going to happen tomorrow, forgetting the fact that you can do nothing about it.
Why is it that we forget who is in control?? Why is it that we think we know it all?? Why is it that we keep rubbing our eyes till we don’t see no more, upping the volume till we hear no more?….Why continue eating more until we lose the taste, dreaming and dreaming with no ambition to take the further step??
Nothing is permanent. Not success and certainly not failure. But a reality check for me was needed. Life is a series of events, and it’s God’s mercy that every person has it in him to pass through. It’s the person himself who chooses – in times of ease and difficulties alike – what to do, who and what to rely on, how to react and how much to learn. For me life is a very good teacher, and I claim to be a good student. At least in front of myself I can say I reacted well enough, didn’t attempt stupid or half solutions (like hiding and getting through the last weeks. YES, it poped in my mind of course!), relied on whom I trusted, did what my conscious told me to do and got one big lesson out of it.
I sincerely believe that whatever happens is for the best, no matter how it looks in the beginning….but that’s me…and another story.…
Over Wa Domtom….
P.S. They work! I mean the prayers….Here are the ones I know….There are many more….May God bless you all…:))
لا إله إلا أنت سبحانك اني كنت من الظالمين
اللهم أجرني في مصيبتي واخلفني خيرا منها
اللهم اني لا أسألك رد القضاء ولكني أسألك اللطف فيه
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
The Curse of Listening....
----Some people might know or guess some of the stuff I chose not to mention here, and I ask them to keep that to themselves----
----*** refers to the country's name----
Let’s begin chronologically, Friday lunch. The Tunisian researcher, heading a department in three different regions of the world for one of the biggest consumer companies there is out there, passed by my office and invited me to have lunch, which I gladly accepted. And over lunch, after the usual stuff, he began talking to me about his life and his views about living abroad.
Saturday was really good weather, and a very nice debate. The successful Egyptian doctor, who has recently moved back to his homeland, was on a business trip. Ironically enough, we talked about living abroad as well.
They both left their homelands to study and stayed, resulting in a very thriving and not so easy life abroad and although they come from different countries, and work in different ones as well, from their words you can sense they came from very comparable environments, and moved to very similar ones. And approximately the same age, circumstances and environments make the comparison very valid.
You think it was boring getting the same talk two days in a row; it wasn't. Although the topic has the same title, I was stunned on how different conclusions can come out from two very similar stories. And by conclusions I don’t mean wealth or success, I mean their own personal views of their decision to leave and its consequences 15 or maybe 20 years later.
Who they are or what they does not concern me. It’s not their story I’m interested in. What caught my attention is how they see their homeland, and the land they went to live in. Two reviews of the same movie made my head twirl, and lead to reinitiating a debate inside my head that I thought was settled a long time ago.
I’ll keep this as short and to the point as I can, refraining from giving my personal opinion due to the fact that it’s not that clear at the moment. And as the profession and nationality don’t really matter, for the sake of eliminating stereotyping and such, both opinions will be stated with no reference to which they belong to. Allow me as well to speak their opinion as if they were presenting it.
“You have a limit. If there is no strong link to the government you can only reach a certain level back in ***”. The Lack of freedom, leads to restraining the potential of people with no connections or links to the government or key persons/organizations. If ambition and quality is the key for success in free nations, to be successful at *** you need to be cunning, deceiving and satisfied by a certain limit. By comparison, here, you work you get paid, you perform you earn, you excel you get rewarded. Performance based system verses ignorance based system. Those who show prospect success are given all the opportunity and facilities to achieve it, while there they grab on to any rising project, hoping to get a piece of what they do not have right to; may that be lawfully or unlawfully. Conclusion, getting away is the best thing that ever happened to me. I love my homeland, I love the people and the culture and I visit friends and family there. But I never would have had the chance to follow my dreams or feed my ambition, I would have been forced to live in boundaries, no matter how much effort I put in.
The other story is quite different….
I achieved a lot I have to admit, and it is really doubtful if I would have done the same thing if I stayed. “You say I am staying for a year, then it grows on you and you can’t escape. I’ll wait until the masters. Just one or two years….and you end up spending half your life there”. There is always more to achieve, and it lures you in ways it is very hard to refuse. And at some point you want to go back, very difficult. Would you leave all what you achieved and go back to less earning and lower standard of living, and most importantly less respect and recognition? Most people don’t. I did though, and if I could go back in time, I wouldn’t have gone in the first place. Everything has a price, but sometimes the bill is just too high. What was the expense of living abroad and success? You are living against the flow, always a minority. Even if you are a citizen. (I, Omar Yousry, completely agree with that. It’s very true!)
Your kids? Never the same. You can fight, but it’s a neither a proportional nor fair battle. It’s a battle against the society, against the community, the school, the friends and even the fellow countrymen who blended in. If you are able to live against the flow or maintain your beliefs, that's because you have a base of being raised up back in *** and had your character built there. But your kids? How long can you protect them? How long can you fight for them. Till when are you going to have something they need? And will they stick around after that is not the case? It’s a lost battle as I see it. It’s like fighting 100 soldiers with machineguns alone holding a kitchen knife. Even if you are sure you can guarantee yourself, you can never guarantee your kids. It’s a 10% chance if you ask me!! “If your 18 year old kid comes home with an earring – something unacceptable for most middle eastern societies – do you have anything to do?? Here, I don’t think so!!”
If you can’t see the link between the two stories, don't worry that much....that's 5 mins of your life that you can never get back...:P If you can, welcome to my world....and if you have a theory there...please do share....
What is my opinion? I really thought I had one….until that weekend. Now I am really confused….I am as lost as a duckling in the middle of the lake with her mummy duck no where to be seen….. Hopefully when I figure it out I’ll share it someday….
Over….Wa domtom….
----*** refers to the country's name----
Let’s begin chronologically, Friday lunch. The Tunisian researcher, heading a department in three different regions of the world for one of the biggest consumer companies there is out there, passed by my office and invited me to have lunch, which I gladly accepted. And over lunch, after the usual stuff, he began talking to me about his life and his views about living abroad.
Saturday was really good weather, and a very nice debate. The successful Egyptian doctor, who has recently moved back to his homeland, was on a business trip. Ironically enough, we talked about living abroad as well.
They both left their homelands to study and stayed, resulting in a very thriving and not so easy life abroad and although they come from different countries, and work in different ones as well, from their words you can sense they came from very comparable environments, and moved to very similar ones. And approximately the same age, circumstances and environments make the comparison very valid.
You think it was boring getting the same talk two days in a row; it wasn't. Although the topic has the same title, I was stunned on how different conclusions can come out from two very similar stories. And by conclusions I don’t mean wealth or success, I mean their own personal views of their decision to leave and its consequences 15 or maybe 20 years later.
Who they are or what they does not concern me. It’s not their story I’m interested in. What caught my attention is how they see their homeland, and the land they went to live in. Two reviews of the same movie made my head twirl, and lead to reinitiating a debate inside my head that I thought was settled a long time ago.
I’ll keep this as short and to the point as I can, refraining from giving my personal opinion due to the fact that it’s not that clear at the moment. And as the profession and nationality don’t really matter, for the sake of eliminating stereotyping and such, both opinions will be stated with no reference to which they belong to. Allow me as well to speak their opinion as if they were presenting it.
“You have a limit. If there is no strong link to the government you can only reach a certain level back in ***”. The Lack of freedom, leads to restraining the potential of people with no connections or links to the government or key persons/organizations. If ambition and quality is the key for success in free nations, to be successful at *** you need to be cunning, deceiving and satisfied by a certain limit. By comparison, here, you work you get paid, you perform you earn, you excel you get rewarded. Performance based system verses ignorance based system. Those who show prospect success are given all the opportunity and facilities to achieve it, while there they grab on to any rising project, hoping to get a piece of what they do not have right to; may that be lawfully or unlawfully. Conclusion, getting away is the best thing that ever happened to me. I love my homeland, I love the people and the culture and I visit friends and family there. But I never would have had the chance to follow my dreams or feed my ambition, I would have been forced to live in boundaries, no matter how much effort I put in.
The other story is quite different….
I achieved a lot I have to admit, and it is really doubtful if I would have done the same thing if I stayed. “You say I am staying for a year, then it grows on you and you can’t escape. I’ll wait until the masters. Just one or two years….and you end up spending half your life there”. There is always more to achieve, and it lures you in ways it is very hard to refuse. And at some point you want to go back, very difficult. Would you leave all what you achieved and go back to less earning and lower standard of living, and most importantly less respect and recognition? Most people don’t. I did though, and if I could go back in time, I wouldn’t have gone in the first place. Everything has a price, but sometimes the bill is just too high. What was the expense of living abroad and success? You are living against the flow, always a minority. Even if you are a citizen. (I, Omar Yousry, completely agree with that. It’s very true!)
Your kids? Never the same. You can fight, but it’s a neither a proportional nor fair battle. It’s a battle against the society, against the community, the school, the friends and even the fellow countrymen who blended in. If you are able to live against the flow or maintain your beliefs, that's because you have a base of being raised up back in *** and had your character built there. But your kids? How long can you protect them? How long can you fight for them. Till when are you going to have something they need? And will they stick around after that is not the case? It’s a lost battle as I see it. It’s like fighting 100 soldiers with machineguns alone holding a kitchen knife. Even if you are sure you can guarantee yourself, you can never guarantee your kids. It’s a 10% chance if you ask me!! “If your 18 year old kid comes home with an earring – something unacceptable for most middle eastern societies – do you have anything to do?? Here, I don’t think so!!”
If you can’t see the link between the two stories, don't worry that much....that's 5 mins of your life that you can never get back...:P If you can, welcome to my world....and if you have a theory there...please do share....
What is my opinion? I really thought I had one….until that weekend. Now I am really confused….I am as lost as a duckling in the middle of the lake with her mummy duck no where to be seen….. Hopefully when I figure it out I’ll share it someday….
Over….Wa domtom….
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Za3laan shewayaa....
----Most probably nothing here will be new, so I hope it isn’t boring----"Ana asly za3laan shewayaa"....this is a verse in a song that passed by me....and made me think about happiness...
I discovered that I have my own interpretation of happiness. Happiness is not absolute, well not in this life at least. Absolute and everlasting happiness does not exist in this world.
Happiness on earth is momentary, meaning it is a temporary feeling. A state of being where you lose comprehension to everything around you and the feeling fills your veins.
Happy is not the opposite of sad, miserable, depressed, gloomy, distressed or any other synonym the word comes up with!! For me, Never was and never will. Just something worth noting as you go on in this….
What I came to acknowledge as well is that it -happiness- can only occur due to ‘good’ reasons. In a more comprehendible way; to be happy, you have to be happy for a nice deed you did, a favor you did without hard feelings, a positive effect you had on something or someone, an achievement you know will effect you or the world around you constructively for days to come or….you get what I mean.
The state of euphoria after breaking a red light, reaching 180Km/h or a long awaited revenge isn’t happiness. Moreover, when you pass a hard test or get straight As, score the winning goal for your team or beat your own record of movies in a row, even earning a promotion at work or getting a bargain on your new car. That’s just not it.
I know a lot of people would question my judgment, and they have all the right to. This is my personal opinion in the end. I do not claim to have unveiled the secret of human happiness, or the rules of the universe. Only God has that. However I do claim to have been through enough in my life, even at 21, to be able to judge for myself….
I allege to know how to spot, indulge and record (in my memory) my moments of happiness, and I believe I always will and I have reasons for that. For me it’s clear enough. See, I think as life goes by, everything goes past you unnoticed or let’s say uncared for, except those stuff that really affect you…..
Any experience you go through in life, as big as getting married or as small as tying you shoelace, has an impact on your life and character. It may be positive or negative and it defiantly varies in scale and effect, but you can never escape! Nevertheless, what remains, or let’s say what leaves a mark, is only a few.
I categorize those experiences as either good, bad or neutral. Bad ones leave a red mark -and the colors don’t mean anything!!- that may be for pain, anger, disappointment, regret and the likes. Green marks unforgettable happy moments, those that gave you satisfaction, true happiness from deep inside. You may have earned them, had them gifted by someone else, or just thrown in your way by fate –or luck as some might say-; but what really matters is that they stay. Neutral -white- would include anything that’s not good or bad, or slightly this or that, and mostly can easily fall into one of the previous two categories.
I even dare to say, that whatever you don’t remember, is not a happy moment. If you were really happy, you will get a permanent stamp somewhere in your brain….it may fade a little or get lost for a while, but it’s there. May it be yesterday, last summer, a few years back or when you were still sucking your thumb; aged five, twenty, or seventy five.……If it’s worth it, you will remember. This also goes for Red or White marks, but I’m talking happy here……!
I hear…“Life sometimes turns 360 degrees”. Yes I agree with that. In fact, that happens very often. You have a very happy incident that you think would result in very good things, but after a period, this good turns into bad and you maybe start regretting that act in the first place. Does this make that so called happy moment a not-happy one? I don’t think so. Even if that happy moment connects or results to another of a different nature, it stills remains a happy moment. You can’t change that. My point here is that these moments are not connected to those before it or after it, even if they are related, or even causing or resulting in it. A very stupid example – I tend to be an expert in stupid examples – is if you are playing football and scored the winning goal, and in the next match you miss a penalty in the last minute that would have put your team through to the next stage. Does the moment after the first match fade as a result…?? To other people maybe, to you Never!!
Most humans in this life are pursuing their happiness, I am not. This is not saying I am waiting for good things to happen to me without working for it. No, life doesn’t work that way. Be optimistic, go for your dreams, do your best and accept whatever the result is. That’s how I see life and try to live it, but let’s leave philosophy for later…..
For me, I am waiting. Waiting for the small moments, the unexpected incidents; the 1 hour of content after a day of hard work, the 1 day of happiness after a year of fighting; the smile on a friend’s face or the tear from a delegate’s eye; the surprising effect of a personal action or the mesmerizing feeling of happiness from a complete stranger. Waiting to see a 10 minute speech or a 20 minute presentation, a brother achieving more than me or a friend doing better than I ever will, a companion I haven’t seen in a while or a stupid award I got when I was 12 for writing a 7 page report about planes. Waiting to hear a word of praise from a person I respect or a warm welcome from a loved one, to look back at months of work in the last minutes before it ends or seeing the smile on my mum’s face after making her slightly happy.
I wait….and I’ll never stop waiting….
I stand there, like a baseball player with his glove open, ready to catch. Ready to seize the moment, grasp the incident and capture the scene. It’s short, it’s momentary, and it only lasts for a while. So keep an eye on the ball when its still high in the air, watch it as it comes closer, stretch your arm as far as you can…..and if you are meant to catch the ball, enjoy….Not the cheering of the crowd or the shouts of your team, but the inner feeling of achievement, the fulfilling mood of satisfaction….Enjoy being Happy….it doesn't last for long...!!
Over…Wa Domtom…
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Sudan....at "Place De La Monnaie"......
----Introducing pictures--------This is for my Zamalek walking buddy, the First SC Jr president and Yaky----
Walking Peacefully in the streets on a busy Saturday, I saw pictures that caught my attention because they had Arabic writing on them. So I went over and had a look, they were pictures about Sudan. Why are there pictures about Sudan in a square in the middle of Brussels? That thought occupied my mind for a mere second, but that was it. I gave them a quick look and walked away with the thought pushed out of my mind.
Why the stupid post then??!! Well because as I was walking out of the square a guy -apparently Sudanese- stopped me and gave me a flyer, and said something in French. Instant translation came from the flyer. There was a "Sudanese Cultural Event" at that square at 6 pm that day. After a few hours the incident popped up in my mind. Seeing that I couldn't think of anything better to do, and it was 5:45, I headed to the Square.
It started 45 minutes late (quite expected), the music was crappy most of the time, only 1 dancer from the five -that kept coming out in different clothes each song- was good, and nothing more really. They had the stage, the speakers, the cameramen and everything. It went on for over two hours, because that’s when I left and it was still going on.
There was a cute Moroccan boy named ‘Abdel Salam’, couldn’t be more than five years old. During the show he kept running near the fountain, and his mother calling him back “Abdul t3aal mama”. Eating a bag of chips sometimes, and sometimes blowing bubbles everywhere. He just ran freely like a bird, nothing on his mind, nothing to bother him. I didn’t envy him; I just thought that most probably he wouldn’t be that cheerful ten fifteen years from now, pity.....
On the steps near by, the drunken man was yelling after each performance as if it was the King of Pop on the stage. I knew he was drunk from his actions, and he had a red Jupiter can in his hand as well. He was male, mid thirties, and by his looks European. I can swear he didn’t even realize the color of his can, let alone appreciate the performance. He seemed happy, or was he?
A while later something distracted me from the show, a voice from where the man was, I looked up to see him in a fight with another man, beating the hell out of him, with blood and all. I don’t know if the other man was drunk as well, doesn’t matter really. In about 20 seconds the police was here, beat the two guys up and handcuffed them. A police car came with a dog, and things were wrapped up.
That guy either has a family and responsibilities and now, because he had his mind turned off from beer, he’s going to cause them so much trouble and misery. Or he could be one of those people who have nothing better to do that drink and fight in the streets, a slave of alcohol as I put it, and no one cares about him, not even himself. Two factors here, ambition and alcohol. The first is the absolute number one defect of the human nature, and the second is mankind’s greatest sin. But neither of these is our topic here.....
The small Belgian -I assume- girl was dirty, and I mean filthy!! She was playing with some dry leaves and the water fountain, and wiping her hand in her already unclean t-shirt. Her mother was near by, and came into sight a couple of times. You can see why the girl is like that if you look at her mother. You must get it somewhere, don’t you??!
You are asking now about that stupid smile I had on my face during the show?? Sudan is to blame.….
They were just happy people. They were celebrating nothing, except being together with their natives, singing songs and dancing. They have their own way of greeting, a pat on the shoulder then a handshake, which I never saw before. Many of them were in traditional clothes, men and women. There were Sudanese from months to 80 years old, and quite a big audience. I noticed, the older you were the happier! Just amazing how they never forgot who they were, how proud they are of a country which most probably is known to the people in the country they live in (Belgium) as the country of starvation. The city was amazing giving people -the Sudanese in this case- the opportunity to express themselves in such a way. And the Sudanese were appreciative by giving a nice show, entertaining the audience on a fine summer afternoon and literally rocking Brussels!
There was this dancer, he was black and he was so happy and smiling always, that his so white teeth were just popping from his face! He just gave me a feel of satisfaction, that this state of happiness he is in is reachable.....
And the main performer that was playing around with different instruments that he barley could play, he was so happy and kept giving that 'krrrrr' sound. 'Sudan Habibna' he repeated over and over.....I almost forgot, he was wearing a Bright Yellow ‘galabeya’ with a bright blue ‘sedeery’ on top of it. As cheerful as can be!! :))
80 years old but dancing like he was 12, you must be taken by how he waves his hand to the stage and laughs, from deep inside, a laugh that most definitely originated from the Nile, and I bet that's where it reached.....
She wasn’t that good looking, nor was her voice the best. She had that glowing presence though! The leading singer of the second part of the show had everyone standing and dancing at the stage. With some swift dance moves and a few words, even the Europeans began to engage in dancing. If you saw how decent she was, if you observed her very simple dance moves; life really seems much simpler…..You don’t have to be a superstar to make people happy….
I walked to the metro station, towards Louise…..When I arrived in my room, It was all over my mind. Yet what gets me the most till now is a very simple question. The audience, the non Sudanese audience in particular, were there standing or sitting for hours….so they must have had a reason. The Question is, were they enjoying the show? the people? simply curios? Or was there something else going on in their minds??
Oh! That’s very nice…..Now I want to go into other people’s minds…..As if my hands aren’t full already….!!!
Sudan was happy, and so was I. Period.
Over…..Wa Domtom….
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Women can’t/shouldn’t Drive
----Maybe something more deep and meaningful was expected, but as I said before, no expectations. It’s my mind that is control here….!!----
----This was intended to be a post with several small thoughts, yet the topic was occupying a greater part of my thoughts than I perceived :D----
---This article is talking about car drivers, not bus, microbus, minibus, motorcycle, bicycle, metro, train, plane…etc. The main focus is the Egyptian roads, cars and traffic. ---
'Women can’t and shouldn’t drive.' That’s a proven fact no one can deny; deepest apologies to all female drivers out there. I get really nervous and worried when I am sitting in a car with a female behind the wheel, I feel like I’m sitting on a bomb ready to explode any minute. I know this probably sounds rude and very offensive, but ‘I come in peace’ really!!
Be it my mother or sister, a friend or a stranger; all the same. Very rarely when I remember sitting next to a female driver and being comfortable. You would say it’s just me…and we all agree about the fact that I’m crazy and all….not this time though!
Proof….ok. Let’s begin with something that very interesting.
I was in my first week, just outside the building where I’m staying in Brussels (that’s in Belgium…Europe!!). So there was this small city car, a VW Golf I think, parking. And the driver was, you guessed, a girl in her 20s. So she wasn’t 70 years old nor were there kids on her lap, but she still managed to hit the car behind her while parking….Twice!!
Kids playing around, talking on the mobile, chatting with someone beside her (eye to eye), getting something from the back seat, looking at a billboard or deciding to turn left a little to late or early!!! In Egypt, you don’t have to be a genius to spot a woman driving.
I’m not saying that men can drive without mistakes, or that they stop to get something from the back seat or never speak on the mobile while driving, they do. However the difference lies in the frequency, the driving concentration level and the percentage. If a man get's distracted once a day, the female is distracted all the day. If a guy deciedes he took a wrong turn and act late occasionally, that's a normal driving procedure for a girl. When a Man does something stupid, and pulls his hand outside the window for apologizing, he knows quite well that the woman he's aplogizing to should have done that a dozen times that day already.
It sometimes seems they are not the drivers the car (women i mean), but the other way round. Seems like it’s a struggle about who’s the boss, a race to be in charge, and the car is miles ahead!! Why is it that most women can’t park, don’t understand the concept of one-way roads and have problems when the car is on reverse?? For God’s sake women should turn their head back while driving backwards!! It’s ABC driving….mirrors are not enough!!! Maho law kol wa7ed beya7’od el ro7’sa beyemte7en sewa2aa….there would have been no need for me to be writing this, because there would be practically ZERO women driving cars!!
Not to mention that in general driving skills, men are way better than women. Using breaks, handling car problems, usage of gas….you name it. That is normal, however that makes a difference. And maybe that explains why we see the Hyundai Matrix in the streets a lot. The car is a disaster by itself, and with a female driving it, I can't seem to think of a worse situation if you are talking roads. Fathers say to their children who newly started to drive, “ 7’aly balaak mel microbasaat, we betoo3 el Delivery, we el 3arabeyaat el matrix 7’osoosaan law say2ahaa set”. We I’m not making that up!!!
Can some women drive? Yes. Do some Women drive better than men? Yes. Should there be a different driving test for women? YES. Don’t get me wrong here, I’m not being sexist. It’s just that women are more prone to emotions, they react differently, and maybe that’s not really good for driving….
If we can say 20% of men drivers who shouldn’t drive, then for women drivers there would be 20% who should drive!!
Conclusion
If I was in charge, I would deny women driving for safety reasons, sacrificing the 20% that can drive for the sake of general wellbeing of the Egyptian society.....
Over…Wa Domtom…
----This was intended to be a post with several small thoughts, yet the topic was occupying a greater part of my thoughts than I perceived :D----
---This article is talking about car drivers, not bus, microbus, minibus, motorcycle, bicycle, metro, train, plane…etc. The main focus is the Egyptian roads, cars and traffic. ---
'Women can’t and shouldn’t drive.' That’s a proven fact no one can deny; deepest apologies to all female drivers out there. I get really nervous and worried when I am sitting in a car with a female behind the wheel, I feel like I’m sitting on a bomb ready to explode any minute. I know this probably sounds rude and very offensive, but ‘I come in peace’ really!!
Be it my mother or sister, a friend or a stranger; all the same. Very rarely when I remember sitting next to a female driver and being comfortable. You would say it’s just me…and we all agree about the fact that I’m crazy and all….not this time though!
Proof….ok. Let’s begin with something that very interesting.
I was in my first week, just outside the building where I’m staying in Brussels (that’s in Belgium…Europe!!). So there was this small city car, a VW Golf I think, parking. And the driver was, you guessed, a girl in her 20s. So she wasn’t 70 years old nor were there kids on her lap, but she still managed to hit the car behind her while parking….Twice!!
Kids playing around, talking on the mobile, chatting with someone beside her (eye to eye), getting something from the back seat, looking at a billboard or deciding to turn left a little to late or early!!! In Egypt, you don’t have to be a genius to spot a woman driving.
I’m not saying that men can drive without mistakes, or that they stop to get something from the back seat or never speak on the mobile while driving, they do. However the difference lies in the frequency, the driving concentration level and the percentage. If a man get's distracted once a day, the female is distracted all the day. If a guy deciedes he took a wrong turn and act late occasionally, that's a normal driving procedure for a girl. When a Man does something stupid, and pulls his hand outside the window for apologizing, he knows quite well that the woman he's aplogizing to should have done that a dozen times that day already.
It sometimes seems they are not the drivers the car (women i mean), but the other way round. Seems like it’s a struggle about who’s the boss, a race to be in charge, and the car is miles ahead!! Why is it that most women can’t park, don’t understand the concept of one-way roads and have problems when the car is on reverse?? For God’s sake women should turn their head back while driving backwards!! It’s ABC driving….mirrors are not enough!!! Maho law kol wa7ed beya7’od el ro7’sa beyemte7en sewa2aa….there would have been no need for me to be writing this, because there would be practically ZERO women driving cars!!
Not to mention that in general driving skills, men are way better than women. Using breaks, handling car problems, usage of gas….you name it. That is normal, however that makes a difference. And maybe that explains why we see the Hyundai Matrix in the streets a lot. The car is a disaster by itself, and with a female driving it, I can't seem to think of a worse situation if you are talking roads. Fathers say to their children who newly started to drive, “ 7’aly balaak mel microbasaat, we betoo3 el Delivery, we el 3arabeyaat el matrix 7’osoosaan law say2ahaa set”. We I’m not making that up!!!
Can some women drive? Yes. Do some Women drive better than men? Yes. Should there be a different driving test for women? YES. Don’t get me wrong here, I’m not being sexist. It’s just that women are more prone to emotions, they react differently, and maybe that’s not really good for driving….
If we can say 20% of men drivers who shouldn’t drive, then for women drivers there would be 20% who should drive!!
Conclusion
If I was in charge, I would deny women driving for safety reasons, sacrificing the 20% that can drive for the sake of general wellbeing of the Egyptian society.....
Over…Wa Domtom…
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Muslim, Egyptian, Arab, African…..Citizen of the world…..
----Introducing formatting effects---
----All I got from people about my first post is "It's so U"...!!! So I decided this would be different....enjoy..;)----
So I was walking in Brussels, all alone, feeling like hell….then I saw a veiled girl (bent mo7agaba ya3nii). And I came to notice; there are a lot of Arabs here in Brussels, mainly from North African countries like Morocco or Algeria. I keep running into them, they really do form a percentage of the population here in Brussels. But it's not Brussels we are talking about here....
It just occurred to me then that I feel better when I see a fellow Arab, someone to relate to in a city full of strangers….I began to wonder what my true identity is? What is it that really defines me as a person?
It’s important to mention here that I first got introduced to the concept I’m talking about in this post in a session in ALMUN, first time I ever got to think where I belonged, or to what am I attached. A lot of the ideas in mentioned started from that session, yet I never got to explore these thoughts until now. That ALMUN experience was great, and what I got out of it goes beyond knowledge or skills…..
I have spent quite a while now trying to figure out how to put this right....but failed...so here goes: SC ALMUN 08 was just exceptional!!! Yasser Sondos Salma Moza 'Merci Beaucoup'....
So in that activity, the responses that came from university students who are supposed to be in charge of My Egypt in a few years really surprised/disappointed me. Ely ye2olaak "ahlawy", wely ye2olaak "chipsawy".....this is what youth in Egypt belong to, football teams and TV commercials....not our topic here....
So anyhow I view myself as an Arab, and I’m proud to be one I guess. I relate the weather, the history, the culture and most importantly the people… I crave hearing “Salamu 3aleekom” now –fil 3’orba–, and Arabic writing on any shop or Arabic speaking in the metro makes me smile….I get internal satisfaction every time I think about it....so yes I am an Arab.
But yet…coming to think of it while walking through the streets and parks of Brussels…I’m a whole bunch of things….Arab, Egyptian, Muslim, African….as well I am GUCian, Ahlawy, a scout, MUNer….and a lot more…
So now what? I think of course!!
If I had to take sides or fight for a cause, if I sought more belonging or if I looked deep inside, what would I find?
I found –respectively– a Muslim, Egyptian, Arab, African and a Citizen of the world!
I feel proud when I see a veiled woman taking the metro taking her kids to school, or walking beside me at P&G talking with other employees. I feel at home in the mosque, and look for the ‘Halal’ sign on restaurants with devotion. I don't mind men with long beards, to the contrary, basteraya7lohom....I take my 5 prayers ahl, will fast Ramadan isa, and try to be in touch with Allah as much as I can. I would do literally anything for my religion and so, my Muslim identity comes first….
….closely followed by my Egyptian blood!! I am Egyptian to the bone, to the last breath, to every inch of my body. I can listen to “2a3’any wataneyaa” all day we mazha2sh, I feel home sick when I go away for a couple of days. I love Egypt, The Nile, the pyramids, the hot summer and the crowded metro. The kind people, el 2ahawy we 3arabeyaat el fool. Tawabeer el 7okooma we za7met kobry 6 october….:)) Walking fil sayeda or El Zamalek, buying stuff men 7’an el 7’alily or riding a Falouka….Shops open 24 hrs 7 days a week, football in the streets before and after dawn, Cairo airport with it’s different maze every week and simply drinking 3aseer and eating leb we dora!! Ana Masry we I’m really missing Egypt every single moment here…I can go on about Egypt, on and on and on....!!! Perhaps later…or not…I don’t feel that anyone shares my passion….
We “Ya 7abibty ya Masrr ya Masr” :D
Then comes Mother Africa. Not much to say here….but it might be kool to note that I don't think Africans are 'iffy' at all......If you need more information about Africa and being an African, my African friend “Mohamed Hesham (Moza)” could be a great source, and I would gladly provide his contacts ;).
Next item on the list....
My boss is Filipino, my roommate is French, my colleague next door is probably German, and there are American, Spanish, Tunisian, and Turkish employees on the same floor I work on; so I could say I work in a multicultural workplace!! I have been to several international scout camps, worked in the US and Switzerland, and been to many countries all over the world….so I claim to know what it is to be sharing the same world with 6 billion human beings. Tolerance, understanding and standing firm about who you are some of the key values to being a good Earthen (mesh earthly ya Nada...:P). I am a citizen of the world, but do I consider my self as an international being? Not really….Does any place on planet earth feel like home, and every person like a brother? Probably not….Would I do something for the sole sake of the human race? I really doubt it…..
So that’s mostly the stuff that really define me as a person….the rest being….
Ahlawy….I don’t really care! I think maybe that should go off the list…
GUCian…I really love my university, maybe I’ll post something about that soon…
Scout…….Definitely coming up!!
MUNer….Those who care know, and who don't won't care…!!
More? Maybe. Does anyone really care??.....No one should....
I keep getting distracted and going off topic I know...but maybe that would get better a couple of posts ahead....In the mean time, this can show you what a troubled mind I have....
Tawelt 3aleeko….I think I’ll stop writing now, and go to sleep….I’ve been having trouble waking up already this week…
Over…Wa Domtom….
----All I got from people about my first post is "It's so U"...!!! So I decided this would be different....enjoy..;)----
So I was walking in Brussels, all alone, feeling like hell….then I saw a veiled girl (bent mo7agaba ya3nii). And I came to notice; there are a lot of Arabs here in Brussels, mainly from North African countries like Morocco or Algeria. I keep running into them, they really do form a percentage of the population here in Brussels. But it's not Brussels we are talking about here....
It just occurred to me then that I feel better when I see a fellow Arab, someone to relate to in a city full of strangers….I began to wonder what my true identity is? What is it that really defines me as a person?
It’s important to mention here that I first got introduced to the concept I’m talking about in this post in a session in ALMUN, first time I ever got to think where I belonged, or to what am I attached. A lot of the ideas in mentioned started from that session, yet I never got to explore these thoughts until now. That ALMUN experience was great, and what I got out of it goes beyond knowledge or skills…..
I have spent quite a while now trying to figure out how to put this right....but failed...so here goes: SC ALMUN 08 was just exceptional!!! Yasser Sondos Salma Moza 'Merci Beaucoup'....
So in that activity, the responses that came from university students who are supposed to be in charge of My Egypt in a few years really surprised/disappointed me. Ely ye2olaak "ahlawy", wely ye2olaak "chipsawy".....this is what youth in Egypt belong to, football teams and TV commercials....not our topic here....
So anyhow I view myself as an Arab, and I’m proud to be one I guess. I relate the weather, the history, the culture and most importantly the people… I crave hearing “Salamu 3aleekom” now –fil 3’orba–, and Arabic writing on any shop or Arabic speaking in the metro makes me smile….I get internal satisfaction every time I think about it....so yes I am an Arab.
But yet…coming to think of it while walking through the streets and parks of Brussels…I’m a whole bunch of things….Arab, Egyptian, Muslim, African….as well I am GUCian, Ahlawy, a scout, MUNer….and a lot more…
So now what? I think of course!!
If I had to take sides or fight for a cause, if I sought more belonging or if I looked deep inside, what would I find?
I found –respectively– a Muslim, Egyptian, Arab, African and a Citizen of the world!
I feel proud when I see a veiled woman taking the metro taking her kids to school, or walking beside me at P&G talking with other employees. I feel at home in the mosque, and look for the ‘Halal’ sign on restaurants with devotion. I don't mind men with long beards, to the contrary, basteraya7lohom....I take my 5 prayers ahl, will fast Ramadan isa, and try to be in touch with Allah as much as I can. I would do literally anything for my religion and so, my Muslim identity comes first….
….closely followed by my Egyptian blood!! I am Egyptian to the bone, to the last breath, to every inch of my body. I can listen to “2a3’any wataneyaa” all day we mazha2sh, I feel home sick when I go away for a couple of days. I love Egypt, The Nile, the pyramids, the hot summer and the crowded metro. The kind people, el 2ahawy we 3arabeyaat el fool. Tawabeer el 7okooma we za7met kobry 6 october….:)) Walking fil sayeda or El Zamalek, buying stuff men 7’an el 7’alily or riding a Falouka….Shops open 24 hrs 7 days a week, football in the streets before and after dawn, Cairo airport with it’s different maze every week and simply drinking 3aseer and eating leb we dora!! Ana Masry we I’m really missing Egypt every single moment here…I can go on about Egypt, on and on and on....!!! Perhaps later…or not…I don’t feel that anyone shares my passion….
We “Ya 7abibty ya Masrr ya Masr” :D
Then comes Mother Africa. Not much to say here….but it might be kool to note that I don't think Africans are 'iffy' at all......If you need more information about Africa and being an African, my African friend “Mohamed Hesham (Moza)” could be a great source, and I would gladly provide his contacts ;).
Next item on the list....
My boss is Filipino, my roommate is French, my colleague next door is probably German, and there are American, Spanish, Tunisian, and Turkish employees on the same floor I work on; so I could say I work in a multicultural workplace!! I have been to several international scout camps, worked in the US and Switzerland, and been to many countries all over the world….so I claim to know what it is to be sharing the same world with 6 billion human beings. Tolerance, understanding and standing firm about who you are some of the key values to being a good Earthen (mesh earthly ya Nada...:P). I am a citizen of the world, but do I consider my self as an international being? Not really….Does any place on planet earth feel like home, and every person like a brother? Probably not….Would I do something for the sole sake of the human race? I really doubt it…..
So that’s mostly the stuff that really define me as a person….the rest being….
Ahlawy….I don’t really care! I think maybe that should go off the list…
GUCian…I really love my university, maybe I’ll post something about that soon…
Scout…….Definitely coming up!!
MUNer….Those who care know, and who don't won't care…!!
More? Maybe. Does anyone really care??.....No one should....
I keep getting distracted and going off topic I know...but maybe that would get better a couple of posts ahead....In the mean time, this can show you what a troubled mind I have....
Tawelt 3aleeko….I think I’ll stop writing now, and go to sleep….I’ve been having trouble waking up already this week…
Over…Wa Domtom….
Monday, June 22, 2009
My First Post...Why and How...Entering the blogging world...
Welcome أهلاً Aloha Bonjour Guten tag!!
If you know me...I'm not the writer...nor the thinker...yet I have many reasons to start this blog.
Don’t be surprised from anything you may read on this blog, I’m crazy and I know it…and I’m ok with it as well…
I believe most people are crazy –no offence–, It’s just a matter of how you deal with you craziness. Knowing when to confine it, and when to set it free; when to act on your impulses and when to take a step back and have a wider view. Not that I do that, but anyway….
Most of the time what is on this blog won’t make any sense to you, but remember that it probably made sense to me and this is my world after all….
Back to why I started this blog…
Simply, I have too much going on in my mind, so I share my madness..!!
I have a brain that thinks too much...
I can sleep anytime anywhere and I bet a lot of people would agree with me on that. However, the only thing that can prevent me from sleeping, is my stupid little brain….even if I am very tired….even if my body is luring for a few hours of sleep, I can stay awake for hours thinking about the day after, an incident a week ago, or even what my kid’s hair color would be!
Do I hear “So what? It happens to everybody”, my answer to that would be then everybody should start a blog!!
Getting the opportunity to share what you are thinking....and to throw everything out, kinda like Dumbledore's pensive, is just amazing. I don't know how this never occured to me...!!!
I would like to note that I’m in Brussels, Belgium at the moment, and that the idea of starting a blog came to me in my first week here. Since I am here alone –of course there are other people, but I mean without any friends/Family- I get some free time.
I've been here for a week, and all I do is think...think...and think....about everything....So wait for more posts to come isa....
My posts will be short, random and hopefully interesting....this is new to me, so ill really appreciate any comments and/or recommendations. And don't expect much....It's just my crappy brain thinking and my crappy hands typing...
I hope I don't stop doing this, as I am really enjoying myself....
Over....
P.S. As this is my first post….mentioning a few someones wouldn’t hurt…Noha my sister....Laila, first one to know about this….Sondos, my inspiration….Nodz, a personal favourite 'aka one of my favorite people'.…..Wessam, for saving me several times....Yaky, always making me proud…..Essam and Noury, bec I miss them….Karawyaa, for the great book we 3alshaan ba7eboo...Shams, waiting for u here buddy….Amr, thx in advance for correcting my spelling and grammar mistakes…Kimo, :))...Adham we Tikha, kefayaa kda....Salma, ben2ool mabrook 3ala el freeedom....we last but not least Moza, 3alshaan sanatnaa teb2aa fol isa!! Wa Domtom....
If you know me...I'm not the writer...nor the thinker...yet I have many reasons to start this blog.
Don’t be surprised from anything you may read on this blog, I’m crazy and I know it…and I’m ok with it as well…
I believe most people are crazy –no offence–, It’s just a matter of how you deal with you craziness. Knowing when to confine it, and when to set it free; when to act on your impulses and when to take a step back and have a wider view. Not that I do that, but anyway….
Most of the time what is on this blog won’t make any sense to you, but remember that it probably made sense to me and this is my world after all….
Back to why I started this blog…
Simply, I have too much going on in my mind, so I share my madness..!!
I have a brain that thinks too much...
I can sleep anytime anywhere and I bet a lot of people would agree with me on that. However, the only thing that can prevent me from sleeping, is my stupid little brain….even if I am very tired….even if my body is luring for a few hours of sleep, I can stay awake for hours thinking about the day after, an incident a week ago, or even what my kid’s hair color would be!
Do I hear “So what? It happens to everybody”, my answer to that would be then everybody should start a blog!!
Getting the opportunity to share what you are thinking....and to throw everything out, kinda like Dumbledore's pensive, is just amazing. I don't know how this never occured to me...!!!
I would like to note that I’m in Brussels, Belgium at the moment, and that the idea of starting a blog came to me in my first week here. Since I am here alone –of course there are other people, but I mean without any friends/Family- I get some free time.
I've been here for a week, and all I do is think...think...and think....about everything....So wait for more posts to come isa....
My posts will be short, random and hopefully interesting....this is new to me, so ill really appreciate any comments and/or recommendations. And don't expect much....It's just my crappy brain thinking and my crappy hands typing...
I hope I don't stop doing this, as I am really enjoying myself....
Over....
P.S. As this is my first post….mentioning a few someones wouldn’t hurt…Noha my sister....Laila, first one to know about this….Sondos, my inspiration….Nodz, a personal favourite 'aka one of my favorite people'.…..Wessam, for saving me several times....Yaky, always making me proud…..Essam and Noury, bec I miss them….Karawyaa, for the great book we 3alshaan ba7eboo...Shams, waiting for u here buddy….Amr, thx in advance for correcting my spelling and grammar mistakes…Kimo, :))...Adham we Tikha, kefayaa kda....Salma, ben2ool mabrook 3ala el freeedom....we last but not least Moza, 3alshaan sanatnaa teb2aa fol isa!! Wa Domtom....
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